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Currently, I'm feeling Dolphinesque

Thursday, November 20, 2008

"Today is the first day of the rest of your life!" That's what some ass told me today. I've heard the saying before, its nothing new. There's no cleverness in repeating someone else's wisdom so why do people insist on handing out advice that's cliché? However, it did get me thinking: What if the rest of my life stays like my life already? What if I have to spend the rest of my life desperately seeking the approval of others, moving from meaningless relationship to meaningless relationship only to find out that my only true friend is my pet cactus, and perpetually being ostracized by those around me? The phrase is supposed to offer some sort of inspiration, offer a positive outlook, provide hope for the future, yet it just spiraled me into a deep hole of depression. I'm typing this while sucking my thumb, curled up in a fetal position, in my closet. Good thing I bought this cordless keyboard. It was on sale and I figured, "What the heck? You only live once."

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I got a phone call today! I was so surprised I peed. The woman on the other end was definitely flirting with me - and I peed again. She was hanging on my every word. I don't have to tell you how much men, with our fragile egos, just love attention. Anyways, we ended up talking for about ten minutes or so. Her comments and questions were straight-forward and to the point (I like that), yet she was playing coy about personal matters. What a sly little fox! She seems to have a fetish for aluminum siding, all ten of her questions were about siding. I've never heard of such a thing. I'm always up for a 'new experience' though, and she was kind enough to sell me what I'm guessing is a 'starter' kit. I can't wait. I sense true love is just around the corner.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Wow! What a beautiful day outside! Its the kind of day you see on postcards and calendars. Its the kind of day that makes you glad you're alive! The kind of day that's almost too good to be true. At least it looked that way when I occasionally looked out the window during my 14-hour Doom3 marathon.

Archives

March 10th, 1969

I can't wait to move. Its cramped in here. The walls are soft, the floors need cleaning, it stinks, its far too hot and there's a definite moisture problem in here. I'm now what's termed as "in the 2nd trimester" so that means there's at least one trimester to go. I'm assuming the "tri" in "trimester" means 3, so that's at least 3 somethings. There's no calendar or clocks in here either. I can't wait to move.

July 17th, 1969

Sorry for the lack of updates, I've been sleeping a lot. I'm still really tired from the move. I wasn't prepared for the emotional aspect of it all. It was sad moving out on my own, leaving the only home I've known. Dad looked proud but mom sure cried a lot. I'm now stuck in what I can only guess to be a homeless ward. There's a bunch of us here. Many of us cry constantly - once again, I'm guessing - because we're homesick. I'm finding that eating with my mouth is a lot trickier than eating with the tube that protruded from my gut. I tend to make quite the mess! Still, I can't complain: there's food, shelter and the warmth of shitty, pissy diapers. What more could a guy ask for? I just wish I could open my eyes.

July 16th, 1971

Whoopee! My 2nd birthday is today! I must admit, I have mixed emotions about the whole thing. I've been thinking about this and my age has doubled in one year. That really sucks! At this rate, I will be 65 years old by the time I hit the 4th grade. Life sure is short when you stop to think about it.

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